Guantanamo Bay
Kasich and Cruz pool their desperation to force Donald Trump into a contested convention. Replacing genocide practitioner Andrew Jackson with slave liberator Harriet Tubman shouldn't be controversial. Years of lawyerless interrogation at Guantanamo Bay failed to connect Murat Kurnaz with terrorism—but Samantha grills him just in case. Superdelegates don't look so bad when they alone can stop you from face-planting in front of the entire electorate.
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