Chic says he's the one that convinced Andrew Lloyd Webber into making ""The Phantom of the Opera"" but was never thanked for it. Sydney comments on how things changed since the O.J. trial. And that lawyers are the only ones that can charge for their 15 minutes of fame. Kay says she once cashed a check for Pablo Escobar and regrets not taking advantage on his ""if you ever want anyone killed, look me up"" offer – better for Mother. Mrs. Nang says Linda Granger has been in her shop and shows an autographed picture. Linda is flying to LA for pilot season (""for me, everyday is pilot season"", says Trevor in the plane), but loses the part of John Stamos's mother to Marion Ross. She decides her career needs a shake and decides to hire a stalker. But a real stalker starts going after her and they go on a car race across town. When Linda's life is in danger, Rayleen steps in as a stunt for Tracey Ullman, who walks out of the set because ""she's done for the day"".

• Gail Parent
• Dick Clement
• Ian La Frenais

• Tobey Maguire
• Tracey Ullman
• Danny Woodburn