It's Bastille Day on board the Titanic II, and Paul is in no state to celebrate as he sinks deep into alcoholism. Tim and Richard decide to tie Paul to a chair whilst Tim rids the basement of the Titanic II of all the priceless bottles of alcohol. Richard goes on a quest to find all the bottles Paul has hidden to quench his thirst. In this episode the 'Doug Anthony Allstars' perform two of their songs, 'I Love the French' and 'Mexican Hitler'.

• Paul McDermott
• Tim Ferguson
• Richard Fidler